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Does the Black Manosphere Understand Data?
The Black Manosphere has a huge problem with illiteracy, lack of reading comprehension, and pulling fake statistics out of thin air.
On any given day, I can scroll through one of the major social media websites and easily find a plethora of comments from men in the Black Manosphere misquoting statistics, misunderstanding data, ignoring context, and making up their own statistics.
For example, one of often-repeated myth in the Black Manosphere is that most Black men aren’t fathers. See the screenshot below.
I’ve seen this false claim made over and over again in an attempt to gaslight Black women, invalidate their experiences and observations of Black men, promote a false defamatory narrative that single Black mothers are all having sex with and having children by a small percentage of Black men, and absolve Black men of any accountability for their actions and influence.
According to the 2014 CDC study “Men’s Fertility and Fatherhood” which was released in 2019, 3.1% of Black males ages 15-19 are fathers, 24.9% of Black males ages 20-29 are fathers, 62.5% of Black males ages 30-39 are fathers, and 80.5% of Black males ages 40-49 are fathers. See the graph below.
The data in this study doesn’t support the Black Manosphere myth that the majority of Black men aren’t fathers. Nor does it support the false defamatory narrative that single Black mothers are all having sex with and having children by “the same small percentage” of Black men.
Considering that a substantial population of Black males are fathers, the data in this study doesn’t support the Black Manosphere myth that the majority or most Black men aren’t fathers. Nor does the data support the false defamatory narrative that single Black mothers are all sleeping with and having children by the same “small percentage” of Black men, whom the Black Manosphere calls “Pookies and Ray Rays.”
80.5% of Black males ages 40-49, 62.5% of Black males ages 30-39, and 24.9% of Black males ages 20-29 all combined together aren’t a “small percentage” by any stretch of the imagination. And if all of these men are “Pookies and Ray Rays,” this simply indicates an even bigger problem that the Black Manosphere has yet to acknowledge and tackle.
At any rate, whoever invented the false claims that most Black men aren’t fathers and single Black mothers are all having sex with and having children by the same small percentage of Black men either didn’t read this study, they read it but they didn’t understand the data, or even worse, they read it and they understand the data, but they LIED and they’re betting on people not reading the study so that their lies can spread unchecked.
Unfortunately, the Black Manosphere’s smear campaign against Black women has made inroads into the Conservative movement, Conservative Evangelical circles, Black relationships platforms, and the Black Femininity movement. I can hear the harmful influence of their false claims when I listen to the rhetoric of political conservatives, Black Christians, Black relationship gurus, and Black women who promote femininity. Let this be a lesson to everyone to stop blindly and uncritically regurgitating the talking points of men who are illiterate, lack reading comprehension skills, gaslight, and flat-out lie and make things up in order to avoid personal responsibility and accountability.
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What You Need to Know If You Minister to Women
***The following blog-article was taken from a Facebook post***
Many Christian women are learning about dating, relationships, and marriage from women’s platforms outside of the local church. Some of these women’s platforms are really good by the way, so I’m not saying anything negative about them.
I think that many Christian women find themselves going outside of the local church to seek sound practical knowledge about these subjects for the following reasons:
*Many churches have not updated their demographic-information about women and men. They’re tailoring their ministerial approach to women based on outdated data.
*Many churches are unaware of certain developments or changes in the dating market.
*Many churches are flat-out ignoring the high rates of intimate partner violence and sexual abuse that women/girls experience, and are not warning or educating women about the pervasive reality of abuse and manipulation in dating, relationships, and marriage.
*Many church leaders make statements about abuse, but they have no self-education, training, or certification in intimate partner violence or sexual abuse.
*Many churches adhere to negative stereotypes and preconceived notions about single child-free women, single mothers, and divorced women. They are out of touch with current research on the diverse realities of single child-free women, single mothers, and divorced women.
*Some churches are responding negatively to women’s progress and are doubling down in their efforts to “put women back in their place.”
*Many, if not most, predominantly Black churches are ignoring the imbalanced black male-to-black-female ratio, black male under-performance, higher rates of intimate partner violence and adultery in Black relationships. Instead of addressing the unpleasant realities of Black relationships, they are telling Black women to just “have faith,” submit to their husbands, “God hates divorce,” etc.
*Many churches underestimate just how “pornified” society is. They don’t seem to realize that porn is the #1 influence on a man’s view of women, sex, masculinity, and male-female relationship dynamics.
If you are a Christian leader who teaches women about dating, relationships, and marriage, you might want to know the following:
*The percentage of single women who are interested in a relationship has plummeted. More single men are interested in a relationship (51% to 60%) than single women (35% to 38).
*Women have surpassed men in obtaining bachelor degrees and now account for more than half (50.7%) of the college-educated labor force in the United States.
*In metropolitan areas, single women are almost twice as likely to be homeowners as single men.
*Young single women tend to earn more money than young single men.
*About 1 in every 3 women have experienced intimate partner violence.
*Anywhere from 40% to 60% of Black girls have been sexually violated by their 18th birthday.
*Black women experience the highest rates of intimate partner violence, adultery/sexual concurrency (overlapping sex partners), and sexually transmitted infections in “exclusive” relationships (including marriage).
*Increased gender equality allows more single women to flourish outside of traditional relationships.
*79% of men between the ages of 18-30 are addicted to pornography.
*There are 1.5 million MORE Black women of marriage-age than Black men of marriage-age.
*A growing number of Black women are pursuing home ownership as a wealth-building tool instead of marriage.
*Children fare better in single parent households than in two-parent homes where there is adultery and abuse.
*There is an inequitable division of household labor in many marriages. Women are working full-time jobs, only to come home and pull a “second shift” of unpaid labor.
*Black women are often the main breadwinner.
*Black women are more likely to marry down than other ethnic groups of women.
*Black women are just as likely to escape poverty as White women UNTIL they marry a Black man. Their children end up sliding into a lower socioeconomic class as a result.
*Women are more likely than men to seek out information on dating, relationships, and marriage. As a result, men have a “relationship-intelligence deficit.”
Most of this information doesn’t paint a good picture for the future of traditional marriages and families. The body of Christ needs to get informed, find out what is going on, listen to women, and adjust our ministerial approach (and perhaps our doctrine, in the areas where our beliefs contradict the full counsel of Scripture).
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I would encourage spiritual leaders who engage women to check out the following resources for useful information on demographics, social trends, intimate partner violence, sexual abuse, and unhealthy/destructive marriages.
Black Demographics https://blackdemographics.com/
The Pew Research Center https://www.pewresearch.org/
The National Coalition Against Domestic Violence https://ncadv.org/
Bureau of Justice Statistics on “Female Victims of Violence” https://bjs.ojp.gov/content/pub/pdf/fvv.pd
Unique Issues Facing Black Women Dealing with Abuse https://www.verywellmind.com/unique-issues-facing-black-women-dealing-with-abuse-4173228
A Large Number of Single Women are Leaving the Church https://relevantmagazine.com/faith/church/why-are-so-many-single-women-are-leaving-the-church/
Your Brain on Porn https://www.yourbrainonporn.com/
“Porn as Erototoxic” by the late Dr. Judith Reisman http://www.drjudithreisman.com/porn_as_erototoxic.html
Anti-Porn Organization “Culture Reframed” https://www.culturereframed.org/the-porn-crisis/
80% of Men isn’t “All Men” but it’s STILL MOST! https://www.covenanteyes.com/2018/07/30/do-all-men-watch-porn/
A Profile of Single Americans https://www.pewresearch.org/social-trends/2020/08/20/a-profile-of-single-americans/
The Demographics of Infidelity in America (not good for Black women!) https://ifstudies.org/blog/who-cheats-more-the-demographics-of-cheating-in-america
Study on Sexual Concurrency (overlapping sex partners) Among Men in the U.S. (not good for Black women!) https://ajph.aphapublications.org/doi/10.2105/AJPH.2006.099069
Single Women are Racing Ahead of Men in Home Ownership https://www.cbsnews.com/news/home-buying-single-women-outpacing-men-in-home-ownership/
Women do more Unpaid Household Work than Men (negatively affects their health more than men) https://www.nytimes.com/2022/09/30/upshot/women-mental-health-labor.html
Black Women are Just as Likely as White Women to Escape Poverty, Until They Marry a Black Man https://www.brookings.edu/research/the-inheritance-of-black-poverty-its-all-about-the-men/
69% of Divorces are Initiated by Women https://www.asanet.org/women-more-likely-men-initiate-divorces-not-non-marital-breakups/
The Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs) Study https://www.cdc.gov/violenceprevention/aces/index.html
40% to 60% of Black girls Sexually Abused by their 18th Birthday (this is a crisis!) https://www.forbes.com/sites/shenegotiates/2012/04/25/black-women-sexual-assault-and-the-art-of-resistance/?sh=75436a897469
“What’s Behind the Rise of Lonely, Single Men?” by Greg Matos PsyD https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-state-our-unions/202208/whats-behind-the-rise-lonely-single-men
A Black Woman/Girl is Murdered Every 5 Hours in the U.S. https://www.facebook.com/blackfemicideUS/
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Books on Intimate Partner Violence, Divorce, and Marriage
“Why Does He Do That?: Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men” by Lundy Bancroft (this needs to be the next book you read) https://amzn.to/3ItwUEt
“The Emotionally Destructive Marriage: How to Find Your Voice and Reclaim Your Hope” by Leslie Vernick https://amzn.to/3SuT1z8
“The Life-Saving Divorce: Hope for People Leaving Destructive Relationships” by Gretchen Baskerville https://amzn.to/3EC7aVs
“Recovering from Biblical Manhood and Womanhood: How the Church Needs to Rediscover Her Purpose” by Aimee Byrd https://amzn.to/3ZjOnWE
“The Great Sex Rescue: The Lies You’ve Been Taught and How to Recover What God Intended” by Sheila Wray Gregoire, Rebecca Gregoire Lindenbach, and Joanna Sawatsky https://amzn.to/3xMLl1F
“He Chose Porn Over Me” by Melinda Tankard Reist https://amzn.to/3KAeuEW
“Is Marriage for White People?: How the African American Marriage Decline Affects Everyone” by Ralph Richard Banks https://amzn.to/3Iw8VEC
Biblical femininity, Biblical marriage, Biblical womanhood, Black Christian women, black femicide, dating, dating violence, divorced women, domestic violence, feminine, gender roles, intimate partner violence, male manipulation, male supremacy, marital abuse, marriage, married Black women, married Christian women, married women, misogynoir, misogyny, narcissistic abuse, patriarchy, relationships, sexism, single Black women, single child free women, single Christian women, single women, spiritual abuse, spousal abuse, widowed women, women in the church, women leaving the church, women's empowerment, women's liberation, women's rights
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